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Amber
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xx Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Thread started on: Feb 15th, 2010, 01:36am »

I am depressed about my current life situation and I don't see any way out. But there has to be, right!? Can someone help me figure it out? I have problems in literally every area of my life. My family life, my health, my job situation, my social circles, my money situation, my friendships, my energy level, etc.

I've been unemployed for a year, the economy sucks and I haven't been able to get hired anywhere. My unemployment benefits will run out in about 5 months. I don't have reliable transportation because I haven't been able to afford a new vehicle in 14 years and can't afford to fix the problems. I don't have a lot of friends, and the few I have I don't have much in common with, we're only friends cuz we've known each other for like 15 years. I have a deep need to belong to something, a big group of like-minded people all working towards a common goal. I don't have a boyfriend, haven't had one for 7 years (I'm 37, so, it really sucks.) I am lonely, bored, confused about what I want to do with my life, and running out of money fast. The last thing I want is to end up moving in with my mom, having no job and no life. I'm a very independent person who wants to live alone and do what I want when I want to. I have my own apartment now but this wont last long if I can't get a good enough paying job soon. I have no health insurance and I have a few things wrong with me (I won't go into detail though). I have interests and hobbies but none of them are easily attainable as a career, pretty much impossible to make a living from unless you're famous, rich and/or really talented. At my age with such limited experience, I feel like a wannabe anytime I try anything. I created my own website but have since lost the desire to keep it up. I've just gotten so extremely lazy. I volunteered at a recording studio I couldn't do it very well and they didn't seem to like me and they stopped calling me. Every time I try to advance my skills/hobbies, I feel incompetent and embarrassed and I give up. It's like I can't even fit in with what I love to do. I also have personality issues (social anxiety, poor communication skills, and some strange problem I can't explain, like people always end up thinking i'm wierd and incapable of doing things right and that I'm not worthy of talking to). I have a father who makes me feel like everything I do is wrong and he doesn't want me to do anything that brings me joy, all he wants me to do is stay home or visit family members (not friends cuz then I end up staying out too late and going out too much, heaven forbid!!) and he tries to control me and he's sometimes emotionally abusive (calling me stupid, making me feel like I'm not up to his standards). I just don't see a way to make my life how I want it, and need help figuring it out!
« Last Edit: Feb 15th, 2010, 01:41am by Amber » User IP Logged

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xx Re: Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Reply #1 on: Mar 15th, 2010, 05:51am »

Well sorry to hear that.. As far as unemployment is concern, i must say if u have capability then u can get any job..Firstly build up your confidence.. You are single may be because u r not working. I would say do some meditation and then get ready to find a new job.. After you will earn something then move forward to the next step
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xx Re: Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Reply #2 on: Mar 17th, 2010, 12:32am »

embarassedi am sorry for that. but don't be depressed, drink a cup of oolong tea and take a deep breath, you will find yourself again.
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xx Re: Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Reply #3 on: Jul 18th, 2011, 5:32pm »

I'm intrigued, U r very insightful laugh
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xx Re: Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Reply #4 on: Jul 28th, 2011, 10:54am »

I am close to your situation! However, I am married and have a job and with a son that is about to graduated from high school added problems.

Sounds like its your season to learn something. We dont learn until pain has been involved in our lives.

For as you being single, pull yourself together, someone special will see you for you. It may be awhile but you cant rush something great!

For as you needing a job, Just get any job so you can have some money coming to you. Then go and find a better one. It will make you a stronger person in the future and Remember your story is for a reason, you may need to talk to others. You cant give advice if you have not been through it yourself!

I think (yours and mine) personalities will change once everything else line up for us. A large part of it has to do with how (you and me) was raised. Your family did not give you self esteem / support, so you must dig deep and get it yourself and pray.


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xx Re: Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Reply #5 on: Oct 4th, 2011, 10:20pm »

I'm really sorry to hear about that. I wish you nothing but the best for you in your difficult journey. Have you thought about joining a church. It doesn't have to be a church, but do something to help you bring your spirit back. Nobody deserves to feel what you feel. I honestly believe we are meant for something really special in this life. Most of the time, our world revolves around money, but that shouldn't be the case. Can I share a poem that really helped me through my hard times?

"GOD'S PLAN
Some things are beyond planning.
And life doesn't always turn out as planned.
You don't plan for a broken heart.
You don't plan for a failed business venture.
You don't plan for an adulterous husband
or a wife who wants you out of her life.
You don't plan to be a failure in life.
You don't plan for an autistic child.
You don't plan for spinsterhood.
You don't plan for a lump in your breast.

You plan to be young forever.
You plan to climb the corporate ladder.
You plan to be rich and powerful.
You plan to be acclaimed and successful.
You plan to conquer the universe.
You plan to fall in love - and be loved forever.

You don't plan to be sad.
You don't plan to be hurt.
You don't plan to be broke.
You don't plan to be betrayed.
You don't plan to be alone in this world.
You plan to be happy. You don't plan to be shattered.
Sometimes if you work hard enough, you can get what you want.
But MOST times, what you want and what you get are two different things.

We, mortals, plan. But so does God in the heavens.
Sometimes, it is difficult to understand God's plans especially when His plans are not in consonance with ours.
Often, when God sends us crisis, we turn to Him in anger. True, we cannot choose the cross that God wishes us to carry, but we can carry that cross with courage knowing that God will never abandon us nor send something we cannot cope with.
Sometimes, God breaks our spirit to save our soul.
Sometimes, He breaks our heart to make us whole.
Sometimes, God allows pain so we can be stronger.
Sometimes, God sends us failure so we can be humble.
Sometimes, God allows illness so we can take better care of ourselves. Sometimes, God takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything He gave us.

Make plans, but understand that we live by God's grace."

I hope you find peace in your heart. God is watching over you and he will never give you more than you can endure. I will be praying for you Amber.
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xx Re: Unemployed, single, broke, unhappy, need help!
« Reply #6 on: Oct 28th, 2011, 12:37pm »

keep doing your best to improve you will succeed one day.
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